what timing!!!!

from my last post you will have read about my timing with my pregnancy and my friends abortion. well here is the story.



i found out i was pregnant in January, and my friend had only just gone though with her abortion a week previously at 4 months!. i don't disagree with abortions, and i was supportive of my friend as i knew her as my best friend and knew the story, so for her it was the right choice.

she had only found out at the 3 month stage, as she didn't keep track of her periods, as most of us don't. i was the first person she told, and had cycled to mine after her doctors appointment to tell me. her attitude was that of disbelief, and was laughing (nervously i guess) at the fact she was pregnant. i just want it out of me she said several times. she was no longer with the father, and wasn't to keen on him. so decided never to tell him to prevent any drama. her choice so we stuck to it.

now she was dead set on having an abortion, but her behaviour over the next month or so was peculiar. understandably i suppose, as she loves babies, and children, and even did a child care course so she is a qualified nanny. she also wants more than 6 kids (yeah wait till you go through 1 labour, then you might change your tune!!!), so this must have been paying on her mind, even tho she said otherwise.

i went with her for her followup appointment to arrange an abortion, there was on a week before Christmas, but we had booked and payed to go on a ski trip with uni, so she decided to wait till after the trip. with the NHS she had to wait till mid January, that was leaving it so late that she would have to have an operation to remove it, as opposed to the tablets you can have while in hospital to induce a miscarriage in Earlie stages, which i hear is painful and distressing in its self.
so things carried on as usual, with the odd remark and behaviour from her. on the ski trip she said at one point how she hoped she would have an accident and have a miscarriage. i suppose it would have taken the responsibility from her. also her behaviour over Christmas caused concern with our friends, as they new and witnessed her telling other people, like her abusive head fuck ex boyfriend's friends, she wanted to keep it from people but yet told the oddest of people like she wanted it to get out. very odd. also she didn't want her sister to know because of the fuss she would have made, and she has a habit of gossiping! her sister has 3 children now, and had her first at 16, so my friend knew how she would react. eventually she told her, and she did go with her to Birmingham hospital for the procedure. not many places Carry out the procedure at the late stage she was at, 4 months. before she went tho, she was looking up pictures on the Internet at the stages of fetal development. i asked why she was torturing herself by doing that, but she snapped saying its better than being ignorant. we told her she would have support if she changed her mind, but she protested that she was sure, and wanted to finish uni, be married and settled before she has kids. i supported her and reassured her so.

so after my naughty night out when i conceived my boy, which considering the timing i should have been more cautious. i found out i was pregnant 1 week after my friend had her abortion, when she was still going through the pain and effects of it. after talking to my mum she was the first friend i went to, as i was for her. we were very best Friends at the time so she was automatically the one i went to. but maybe i shouldn't have. but then i wasn't going to hide it from her. i stated i should have known better considering the situation, but she reassured me and asked how i felt. scared but excited. totally different to her she said, and that i had my own choice to make. this conversation was the last before things got distant between us.............................